|WE need to have self-control too--dogs can get under your skin when they get into too much trouble or are belligerent. ;-) You want to be aware of your reactions as well as the dog's, and not get sucked into a battle of wills or a wrestling match. Remember that negative attention is still attention...my roomate used to have a shepherd who would get into all sorts of trouble, then come over wagging her tail like "I was bad, aren't you going to punish me?" He would get rough with her sometimes for being naughty, & it was pretty freaky b/c it was almost like she was a masochist, she liked any & all attention even if he was being nasty to her & would go out of her way to do the things that set him off.
When you have a difficult (i.e. bratty, obnoxious, or overzealous) dog, it's easy for the human to get anxious & emotional too. I bet you can already guess how much benefit THAT will add! <bg> Try to put away your emotions and treat her calmly, casually & professionally. This isn't personal, it isn't a contest or a competition ("your will vs. hers"--believe me, that is soooooo easy to fall into & I have done it myself more times than I care to admit!! ;-)
I'm not sure how frustration and anxiety smell to dogs, but they may smell similar to fear, and that may cause the dog to act differently or let her think she is manipulating you. ;-) Remember too, that even if that's what she is doing (manipulating), she's not doing it to be malicious--she's a DOG, not a human <g> She's doing it b/c it *works*, or b/c she *thinks* it does....and right now she doesn't know any other way to get what she wants, she doesn't know what her options are. (And she's way too excited to think them through!)
Be flexible! If one approach isn't working, drop it and try something entirely new. :-) It's so easy to get "tunnel vision", and be so focused on a specific protocol that you miss the obvious: *this* way is not the *best* way for that particular dog--no matter how many dogs it worked great on in the past.
Use tools! (Ahhh...one of the greatest advanages of being a human. <g>) If she drags you while walking, there are lots of aids available. Check into the prong collar. (NO, it's not "mean". It only *looks* mean. Read on: http://www.flyingdogpress.com/prong.html In fact, I recommend reading the rest of her articles as well. <g>)
Or, look into the Gentle Leader or Halti Headcollar. If you control the dog's head, you control the dog! ;-)
You can also control the dog's head by using special food treats--this is how bridge-and-target training works, and it is effective on dogs, cats, horses, dolphins...believe me, *your* stubborn dog can learn it too! ;-) This is also a very easy way to teach "sit" to puppies...and "sit" is the foundation for no-free-lunch programs, basic control, distraction/incompatible behaviours training, and lots of other stuff that is indispensible to dogs. Just move the treat (with the pup's nose glued to it, of course) up above the pup's head and backwards towards their tail. In order to keep the treat in view, the pup has to sit...wa-la! "Yes!" "Sit." Gooooooood puppy!! :-)
Remember also that a tired dog is a good dog. Make sure yours gets enough exercise--that, in & of itself, should alleviate some behavioural problems.
Don't let bad behaviours be continually reinforced. If he just can't keep his nose out of the trash, *put the trash can in a closet, or tack it to the wall*. Each time he gets into it, he is rewarded...and he's that much more likely to do it again.
If she leaps up on you & rips her dinner out of your hands when you go to feed her, go out with her food in a bucket, with a lid. Then, she gets it after she "sits", or does something else to earn it!
If she's an outside dog, and she mauls you each time you go into her pen to feed, put her on a tie-out. Feed & water her in peace, then let her back in the pen. This way she hadn't been rewarded for mauling you--and YOU are less likely to get frustrated and anxious with her.
Ideally, we humans can think things through before we do them, and do the thing that's in our (& the dog's) best interests, rather than just reacting, or doing what makes us feel better. ;-) Of course, we're not too much different than our dogs on the most basic levels, & I don't think we're going to hit 100% any more than they are. The important part is that we keep trying...and that we learn one important virtue from our dogs: never waste your valuable time & energy holding a grudge. ;-)